I am so annoyed that half the time I come home, there are complete strangers working on something that doesn't need to be fixed in my bedroom. They unlock it, let themselves in, move my stuff around, and never let me know where anything is or why they came into my room.

I already spoke to my landlord, and told him how uncomfortable it made me feel... and they're doing again today. It makes me feel so violated, I don't even know what to say anymore. :ADFSOIfghjaaaaa;wae8rtu3wfuhs ;JL!!

I'd like to write a blog about lèse majesté but am too worried about having the Thai police come knockin' on my door and taking me away. If I were write anything that could come off the slightest bit negative, I could be in big trouble.

By the way, I can't access the Wikipedia page on the King because the government has blocked it. Fascinating, huh? Guess I'll have to wait almost 2 months until I'm back in the states.

Mom, Molly, and Dan have been in Thailand for a week now. We were in Bangkok for a couple days when they first got here, just walking around the streets, checking out the vendors.

Then we went to Ayutthaya for 2 days and passed through my neighborhood, Pathum Thani, on the way there. With the exception of our driver who really creeped us out and kept taking photos of Molly with camera phone, it was awesome to go back to Ayutthaya. I went earlier this semester with my program, but knew that Mom would want to see all of the ruins. They really are beautiful and originate from the 14th century!

After Ayutthaya, we flew up to Chiang Mai which is where we are right now. The most exciting part of the trip for Mom, Dan, and Molly was visiting the elephant camp where they got to ride elephants, travel in an ox-pulled cart, raft on a bamboo raft, visit an indigenous tribe called the 'Long Necks', and afterward, they went to the tiger camp and played with tigers! Unfortunately, I had food poisoning that day and I was in bed for hours, so I had to miss out...

Chiang Mai has a lot of night markets and cheap vendors, so we also bought a lot of stuff for ourselves and for friends and family back home.

I would write more but I just lost interest, haha sorry! I'll write more once I'm back in Pathum Thani (since I will have to study for midterms but will need a break!).

I get to see Mom, Dan, and Molly tomorrow! Then after they leave, I have a week of midterms, then Dad and Chandelle are visiting! I'm so excited!

I guess that means I should clean my room. I haven't cleaned a single time since I've been here. Nor have I unpacked my suitcases. I hate unpacking more than anything. Almost more than loading and unloading the dishwasher, but thankfully we don't have a dishwasher (or any dishes, for that matter).

Still very itchy. I think I got bit by that bug again. More bumps are showing up.

Um. I don't really have anything to say, I'm just bored... Everyone has left for break already (Laos, Cambodia, Malaysia, Singapore, South Korea, Chang Mai, Koh Lanta--we're all over the place!) so I'm here alone. I've been watching lots of TV and I'm starting to get cabin fever. I guess I'll be productive today and clean my room, do my laundry, and go for a walk to find our smoothie lady (who makes the best watermelon and lime smoothies IN THE WORLD).

My eyes are officially opened.

As my time in Thailand has progressed, I've found that I have very mixed feelings towards this place. Perhaps it's because I always learned about Southeastern Asia through Western eyes, but I always thought it seemed like a relatively magical place with beautiful architecture, kind people, strange ways of life, and a culture that thrived on respect and tradition.

Well. Respect and tradition my ass. If I've learned anything at all, it's that America is an amazing country and I'm ashamed to have ever lost faith in it (which I did for quite some time, as if I've been alive long enough to say that).

There are so many stigmas about American culture that other countries place on us, even ones that we learn about in our classrooms at home, as if we are the root of all evil or something. We dress too casually, we're loud, girls act too provocatively, we care too much about what others think, we're obsessed with TVs and other forms of mass media... We're too this, and too that. We've lost sight of history, of reverence, of tradition... The list goes on. Layer after layer of negative stereotypes.

And even here in Thailand, in my Thai Language and Thai Civilization classes, they teach us all these rules about how to act towards the elderly, how to bow properly, how to speak formally... because God forbid we do something wrong to disgrace their culture and further shame ourselves as 'ferangs', what they call foreigners (literal translation: white person).

Guess what? Not once have I seen a Thai student treat the elderly how we are taught to treat them. Not once I have seen a Thai student treat a waiter at a restaurant like a human being. Not once have I seen a Thai student give anything to the poor or the crippled that beg on the streets. Not once have I seen a Thai student respect a professor in the classroom.

The girls dress more provocatively on a daily basis than me or any of my friends have ever dressed in our entire lives. Girls who are wider than a yard stick believe they're "fat", so they wear more make-up and higher heels to feel prettier. Every restaurant or street-side vendor has a TV on some Thai soap opera or a radio blaring Western Top-40 music. Students absolutely never listen in class, nor do they take notes, nor do they show any interest whatsoever.

That said: why have I always learned about my own culture from such a negative light when we aren't any different than the rest of them? Why do all these unfavorable stereotypes fall on our shoulders and not theirs? It isn't fair that when we travel we're told to be careful because so many people dislike us. It isn't fair that we're considered 'racist' for having slavery when I hear Thai people yell "FERANG!" at me at least twice a week.

Believe it or not, this isn't a rant against Thai culture, regardless of the harsh or negative statements. This is the first time I've put these thoughts into words, and they're things that have been frustrating me since the day I became accustomed to life here. At first I just got angry all the time, angry at how hypocritical Thai culture seems. Then I realized that the anger stemmed from a new found pride I have in being American, and I came to see that we aren't nearly as "bad" as we or others are told.

Every culture is one in the same; we just live differently. (And thank God for that or else this world would be boring as hell.)